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Brian Kilmeade wants America to be pure, and that means stop marrying those damn ethnics

July 9, 2009
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Most of the time Brian Kilmeade, Gretchen Carlson and Steve Doucy- the trio that comprise Fox News’ “Fox and Friends” morning show, act like insipid children whose attempt at fair and balanced coverage-comes across as disingenuous and transparent at best.  Every now and again however, a pearl of wisdom is plucked from the clam of inanity.  Take this exchange by Mr. Kilmeade, Mrs. Carlson and guest co-host Dave Briggs on the subject of marriage and disease:

Hat tip to Media Matters

GRETCHEN CARLSON (co-host): Speaking of spouses —

BRIAN KILMEADE (co-host): Yes.

CARLSON: — did you know that being married is healthy for you? At least when it comes to Alzheimer’s disease or dementia or things like that. This group did a study. They first interviewed middle-aged people around 50 in the 1970s and the 1980s, and then they came back to look at them 21 years later. Those who were married at that point in their life, in the midpoint of their life, ended up having much fewer cases of Alzheimer’s than those who were —

DAVE BRIGGS (guest co-host): Yeah.

CARLSON: — divorced, single, widowed, et cetera.

BRIGGS: I’m kind of conflicted on this one. Because on one hand, I think my wife keeps me sane, because I lose everything and she helps me find it. But I leave cabinets open —

CARLSON: You too, huh?

BRIGGS: Does your husband leave cabinets open?

CARLSON: That first thing you said.

BRIGGS: Losing things? Right?

CARLSON: Yeah.

BRIGGS: But I leave these cabinets open all over the house. I come back in the room, and they’re closed. And sometimes I think I’m losing my marbles a little bit. Then I realize she just likes to come behind me and —

CARLSON: She’s just looking out for you, Mr. Briggs.

BRIGGS: — close things and put things away.

KILMEADE: I’m just amazed that they thought about doing this study in the — by interviewing people in the 1970s and the 1980s.

BRIGGS: A little dated, you think?

KILMEADE: The average is 50, and they see that they keep it together. I find this — I find this somewhat —

BRIGGS: Go ahead.

KILMEADE: Different. Leave it to the Finns and Swedes to some up with something. They literally —

CARLSON: Don’t look at me, pal.

KILMEADE: Because that’s a — we are — we’re — we’re a — we’re — we keep marrying other species and other ethnics and other —

CARLSON: Are you sure they’re not suffering from some of the —

KILMEADE: I mean, the Swedes —

CARLSON: — causes of dementia right now?

BRIGGS: What are you getting at?

KILMEADE: See, the problem is, the Swedes have pure genes.

BRIGGS: OK.

KILMEADE: Because they marry other Swedes. Because that’s the rule. Finland — Finns marry other Finns, so they have a pure society. In America, we marry everybody.

BRIGGS: OK.

KILMEADE: So, we’ll marry Italians and Irish.

BRIGGS: So, this study does not apply?

KILMEADE: Does not apply to us.

BRIGGS: Huh. You are a scientist.

CARLSON: Amazing deduction, Kilmeade.

BRIGGS: Scientist.

KILMEADE: That’s a — those are —

BRIGGS: Dr. Kilmeade, it is.

KILMEADE: That’s how I feel.

BRIGGS: All right.

CARLSON: Thank you for filling us in on that —

BRIGGS: Let’s see how he feels —

CARLSON: — Italian-Irish man.

You can see the video here.

I suppose we should just gloss over this and move on.  After all, Fox News is the last bastion of truth in reporting the news right?  Maybe he’s right.  Or, maybe he’s ignorant.  Judging by the banter and style of reporting done on that show, my money is on the latter.

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